Shay Martin Shares Her Late Husband Tanner’s Sole Request If She Ever Remarries

1 October 2025

Shay and Tanner Martin. Shay Martin/instagram

Shay Martin recently opened up about a deeply personal conversation she had with her late husband Tanner Martin regarding what conditions he would want should she ever decide to marry again. On an emotionally raw episode of The Unplanned Podcast, Shay, 29, recalled the moment when Tanner, who died in June at age 30 following a battle with colorectal cancer, jokingly yet sincerely set one rule: any future husband must sleep at the foot of the bed.

She recalled that “serious-very-sweet Tanner” expressed a heartfelt desire for her to find joy and love again, while “goofy Tanner” quipped, “Yeah, you can remarry, but he has to sleep at the foot of the bed. One thousand percent, that is a direct quote.” When asked about remarriage she replied candidly that she often receives that question and that she wants to be cremated so any future spouse could symbolically share in her remains—a remark she described as part lighthearted, part sincere.

Shay and Tanner’s love story was deeply intertwined with their battle against illness. Tanner first revealed his stage 4 colon cancer diagnosis in late 2020 when he was just 25, and after years of treatment and uncertainty, the couple learned the disease was incurable. Despite the prognosis, they remained hopeful, dreaming of a future together even as time grew short.

In November 2024 they announced they were expecting their first child, and in May 2025 their daughter AmyLou was born. Just weeks later, Shay shared a prerecorded video Tanner made before his passing, in which he opened with, “If you’re watching this, I am dead,” and spoke about his hopes and what lies beyond life.

When Shay discussed the burial arrangements on the podcast, she revealed that she and Tanner had already chosen a joint headstone bearing both of their names. That choice, she said, was made with the understanding that even in death their connection would endure. The decision underscores the depth of their bond and the intentionality they shared even in facing mortality.

In recounting Tanner’s condition and the couple’s final days together, Shay described a partner who was thoughtful even as he suffered. She remembered a moment when after leaving hospice care to return home, Tanner insisted on watching the original Indiana Jones trilogy. That small act was a quiet testament to his determination to cling to ordinary pleasures amid hardship. She called him “the goofy Tanner” as much as “serious-very-sweet Tanner,” capturing both the loving levity and profound tenderness that characterized their marriage.

Though struck by grief, Shay has been transparent about navigating life as a widow and a new mother. She acknowledged that questions about moving forward are natural but also heavy. Her mention of cremation and ashes reflects both acceptance and the complexity of how someone rebuilds life after loss. It reveals a mindset rooted not in defiance but in hope and compassion.

Shay’s public reflections also invite us to consider how love, illness, and legacy intersect. The request that a future spouse sleep at the foot of the bed is more than a quirky rule—it is a symbol of Tanner’s presence and the kind of love he wanted to leave behind. It suggests he hoped she would be loved again, but never in a way that erased what they had.

Their relationship was always marked by vulnerability and shared dreams. Shay’s decision to share the condition Tanner set feels like a gift a window into their intimacy and into the promise he made even as he faced death: that she should not be alone forever. It is a gesture both protective and freeing, anchoring his memory in the possibility of a renewed life for her.

As Shay continues to honor Tanner’s spirit and raise their daughter AmyLou, she is navigating uncharted terrain. She is simultaneously a mother, a widow, and a person still capable of love. Though she does not know what the future holds, she carries with her Tanner’s wish and the freedom to define what happiness will look like next.